You're Not Alone
by kpoly
Summary: Edward. My stomach twitched just thinking his name. Yes, I couldn’t deny it. I was attracted to him. Actually, every girl in the state of Washington wanted him. I didn’t even like admitting that I thought about him sometimes, because I hated Edward Cullen
1. Chapter 1

I sighed as I pulled the packing tape over the last brown box. "Do you really have to leave today for your stupid trip?" I pouted as I turned to my best friend.

"Bella, you only think it's stupid because you're not coming." Alice turned to me as her eyebrows shot up playfully. Granted, this was true, but I mean she couldn't blame me for not wanting to go. She and my brother would most likely be frantically groping each other the entire cruise, and I am pretty sure our friends, Emmett and Rosalie, wouldn't be to far behind.

"However," she began speaking, "you are more than welcome to come along." I rolled my eyes and turned back to the boxes, stacking them on top of each other. "No thank you. Besides, I'm going to have to unpack my shit at my new place." I shot a look at her. "And since you have decided to leave me behind, you will not be allowed to help decorate when you get back." She actually looked hurt for two seconds before she stuck her tongue out at my and started laughing. "Whatever Bells, you know everything will sit until I come back." I grimaced at her statement, because she was probably right.

"Alice! Come on, we're going to be late." I heard Jasper yelling from the living room. Her eyes lit up as she grabbed my arm and practically pulled me down the hall. Jasper stood by the front door looking absolutely frustrated, as he pulled his baseball cap on. I laughed to myself, because I knew no matter what he tried to do, he could never stay angry with Alice for more than two minutes. She just skipped toward him, stood on her toes, and pecked him on the lips. He lazily wrapped his arm around her waist, and turned to me.

"Bella, are you sure you don't need me to help you with your stuff." He asked me concerned. I ran my hands through my hair and looked up at my brother. I knew he hated being late, but wouldn't leave me here if he truly thought I would get stranded. "You know, I just want you to be gone before Renee gets home." He added quietly. "Don't worry Jazz. Most of it's already in the truck anyway. I should be done here in about ten minutes. And you have a plane to catch, which if you don't hurry, you're going to miss." He sighed as he looked down at his watch. Pulling his keys out of his pocket, he walked up to me and pulled me into a hug. "Just hurry, who knows who will be coming home with her" he whispered into my ear. "Yeah, I'll miss you too." I chuckled into his shoulder. Alice danced to me and pulled me into a tight embrace.

I followed the two onto the small porch, and leaned against the railing. Alice held Jasper's hand until they reached the passenger door, and he helped her in. I swear, those two were made for each other. They knew it too. We moved to Forks, when I was a freshman, Jasper was a sophomore. He saw Alice in the library. I remember laughing at him after I caught him staring at her, and he couldn't stop the red to rush his cheeks. I think she knew he was watching too, because when she walked by him she conveniently dropped all her books on the floor. I could barely hold in my laughter, when Jasper nearly knocked his chair over to help her. Since that moment, they have been attached at the hip, and Alice and I became best friends. That was nearly five years ago.

"Hey Bella, can you do me a favor?" Alice called from inside the car. I just looked at her and nodded. "Can you stop by my place, and check in on my brother. I think he's getting sick." I just looked at her. Emmett was going with them on the trip, so that only left the other one. Edward. My stomach twitched just thinking his name. Yes, I couldn't deny it. I was attracted to him. Actually, every girl in the state of Washington wanted him. I didn't even like admitting that I thought about him sometimes, because I hated Edward Cullen. He never spoke to anyone, accept his siblings, and even that was on a rare occasion. I wouldn't say he was unfriendly…well yes, he _was_ unfriendly. Alice tried to explain to me that he took his adoption harder than her or Emmett. Like that could be used as an excuse. Emmett was just fine. Alice was just fine. And Edward too should be _just fine. _He should be lucky he had two people willing to take him in, care for him, and love him. _Ungrateful bastard. _ "No Alice. I don't think I'll make it –" I was interrupted by her yelling thanks as she rolled up the window, and Jasper pulled out the driveway. I just glared at the car as it drove down the street. I'm still not going over there.

After everything was loaded into the back of my pickup, I ran back into the house to grab my keys, and my duffel bag. Glancing at the clock, I realized it had taken me longer than I thought it would. I grabbed my bag off the floor, and my keys as well, and made my way towards the living room. It wasn't until I almost reached the room, that I heard the movement from the kitchen. Shit. I silently wished that I had taken Jasper up on his offer, and shook my head knowing it was too late now. It sounded like she was alone, but any visitors she had were probably waiting in her room. I made a quick dash towards the door, hoping to leave before she saw me.

"Bella, may I ask where you are going?" she spoke fiercely from the archway to the kitchen. I turned around to face her. She looked horrible, probably already drunk and it wasn't even 3:00 yet. Her unkempt hair hadn't been brushed in only God knows how long, and she was wearing the same overly tight jeans, and dirty halter top from Monday. It was now Friday. I really wasn't in the mood to stand her and discuss my plans, but I answered her anyway.

"Well Renee, if you recall, I'm moving out." She took a step forward, and then back again, before grabbing the wooden frame. Yep, drunk. "What have I told you and your brother about calling me Renee?" her eyebrows furrowed together, as if she was trying to remember herself. Actually, the only thing she ever said about it was, _Don't call me Renee._ Maybe it was disrespectful to her. I'm not quite sure, but honestly I didn't give a shit. I couldn't remember the last time I called her mom. However, I _could_ remember the first time Jasper called her by her first name. It was on his seventh birthday. I remember because we sat on the front steps of our little house in Phoenix. It was hot, and I can still feel the sweat crawling down my back.

"Come on Jasper, let's just walk to the playground" I pouted as I kicked my sandal on the step. I hated our yard in the summer, especially August when it felt like hell itself was suffocating me.

"No. She'll be here soon. I don't want the ice cream to melt," he whispered between the space between us. I couldn't argue with him there, melted ice cream would be the biggest let down. I remember we sat there until the sun wasn't high above our heads anymore. It had almost fallen below the horizon, when the old Chevy clunked into the driveway. I felt Jasper sit straight up, a smile playing on his lips. I was too tired to even turn my head in her direction.

"What are you two doing sitting out here?" she spat at us, while taking a sip of something in a brown bag. I felt Jasper tense next to me, and I reached over a grabbed his hand.

"We were waiting for the ice cream" I added drearily to the conversation. "Why would I be bringing home ice cream?" she eyed me suspiciously. I just looked at her, scared to say anything. Of course she knew why she would be bringing it home. She _had _to know. She just kept staring at me. I looked down at my pink sandals wishing I had just gone to the playground by myself. I glanced over at Jasper and his head was down. "Because it is Jazz's birthday" I whispered. She took another swig from the brown bag, and walked toward the porch. She stopped in front of us for a few seconds before pushing past us up the steps. I don't know when he stood up, but he was now facing the front door, as she struggled to get it open.

"Because it's my birthday, Renee!" Jasper screamed at the top of his lungs. Tears were filling his eyes, and bubbling over the edges. He balled his little hand into a fist, and mashed them away. "What did you call me?!" Renee screeched as she practically jumped from the porch, and stood in front of him. I couldn't see him at this point, because she was blocking my view, but I could hear the slouch in his voice. "Renee" he said again. I didn't like when she was like this, and I had learned to just stay away from her. Looking back down at my sandals, I _really _wished that I had gone to the playground. I could be swinging right now, or climbing the jungle gym. I only looked up when I heard the smack. Jasper was on the ground, holding his cheek. She bent down towards his face, "Don't call me Renee." She grabbed the brown paper bag off the ground, which must have fallen when she hit him, and walked back up the steps, and into the house. Jasper was still sitting on the ground, holding his face, and crying. I didn't know what to do. I didn't have any ice cream to give him, so I did the next best thing. There was a green lid from a Sprite bottle lying on the ground, and I bent down to pick it up. Walking towards him, I wished I had made a card for him. I had all that extra construction paper sitting under my bed. Sitting next to him on the ground, I shoved the lid into his unoccupied hand, and grabbed the one holding his cheek. "Sorry." I mumbled. He smiled at the green lid, and pushed down into his pocket. I did the only thing else I knew to do on birthdays, and hoped he would like it. "Happy birthday to you…happy birthday to you…"

I was jostled out of the memory, because tears were prickling my eyes, and threatened to betray me. I straightened my shoulders back and stared at her. That birthday was the first of many let downs, and disappointments. Looking back on it now, I am glad Jasper said that. She didn't deserve the title mom, and he wasn't going to reward her with it.

"Honestly, I could give a fuck what say" I paused before turning the door knob. "Have a nice life Renee" I tossed the words over my shoulder, and slammed the door behind me.


	2. Chapter 2

_The sun was just barely coming up, and casting light into them living room. Normally, I would have been too tired to notice, and grumpy that I still wasn't in my Snow White sheets. However, I was way too excited for that. I had waited six months, 3 weeks, and five days for this trip. My parents were finally taking Jasper and I to Disneyland. It felt like it was taking forever for them to get everything in the car, and I was growing anxious. I didn't want to miss Mickey Mouse. _

_Jasper ran into the house, his face flushed with excitement. "Come on Bells! We're finally ready!" he practically screeched into the room. I responded with a squeal, and hopped off the couch. Running past him, I skipped all the way to the driveway. _

_"Finally daddy, I thought we were _never_ going to leave." My father just smiled at me, while lifting me into the backseat, and buckling the seat belt. "Of course we were going to leave honey. Can't meet Mickey at the house, could we?" he winked at me, and I bit my lip to hold in the other squeal that so desperately wanted to escape my lips. My father turned back towards the porch. "Come on son, let's get you settled in," he called to Jasper._

_Before locking the door, my mother looked over at Daddy. "Charlie, do we have everything?" Daddy just responded with a quick nod and a thumbs up. _

_"Everyone ready?" Mommy called from the front seat. Jasper and I both jumped in our seats excitedly. The drive to the airport felt like it took eternity, and Jasper kept throwing Skittles at me. I don't know why the plane couldn't just meet us at the house. Driving there was taking so much longer! I asked Mommy this and she just smiled at me and told me planes had to stay at the airport. Well that's a stupid rule if you ask me. _

_What felt like a hundred years later, we were finally unpacked at the hotel, and headed to the park. Why were they walking so slow?! Don't they understand the importance of today? I am meeting Mickey Mouse! Oh, and maybe Snow White and Cinderella would be there too. _

_It started to rain shortly after we arrived, and I couldn't help the tears that spilled from my eyes as my parents pulled us into shelter. "What's wrong honey?" Mommy asked me, while bending down to look into my eyes. I just sniffled and looked at her. "Now, I'm never going to meet Mickey. And that's not fair. Alley from the playground as already met him _twice _and I can't even meet him once!" I wailed at her. She pulled me into a hug, and let me ruin her new shirt with my salty tears. "I promise you'll get to see him before we leave baby." I just looked up into the blackened sky, and cried harder._

_She kept her promise though. I finally got to meet Mickey. It was the best day of my life. I saw his ears through the crowd, and practically ran off to greet him. Mommy stopped me though, and told me it wasn't a good idea to go by myself. So, she scooped me up on her back, grabbed Jasper's hand, told Daddy to follow, and we all ran towards the life size mouse. It was so cool. Daddy handed the camera to some lady, and asked her if she would take our picture. Man that was the greatest moment of the whole trip. Even Jasper screaming like a little girl on the merry go round couldn't top getting your picture taken with Mickey Mouse!_

---------------

I strained to pull myself up off the floor. Looking around at all the unmarked boxes, I tried to remember which one had that picture in it. I pushed my way to the smaller boxes at the corner of the room, and started rummaging through the first one. Nothing but socks and underwear. I tossed it to the side, and started on the next one. I hated that I needed to see it, but the dream felt almost unreal, and I wanted to remind myself that it wasn't just that, a dream. I had to know that that was once my life, even if it had been almost fourteen years ago.

I finally found it. The picture was bent and wrinkled; the corners ripped a little. But it was real. I sighed as I leaned my back against the wall. Holding it up to my face, I looked at the last family portrait before everything turned to hell.

Charlie had one arm around Renee's waist, his other arm on my shoulder. His head was slightly turned towards Renee, but you could clearly see a smile playing under his dark mustache. Renee was leaning against him, while holding on to Jasper's shoulder. Mickey Mouse was standing next to Charlie and I. I was clearly smitten with that damn mouse, because my face was tilted up towards him, with my mouth hung open it laughter.

I chuckled to myself, when I looked at Jasper. He had a big toothy grin on his face, and had his arm reached out giving me bunny ears. When Charlie had gotten the film developed, I nearly had a heart attack. I ran into Jasper's room, screaming at the top of my lungs, and demanded to know what was wrong with him. He just laughed at me. I have committed to memory the exact screech that came from my mouth when I told him he ruined my life, and threatened to take a black marker and color his face out of the picture if he didn't apologize to me and my stuffed Mickey doll.

God, I was such a drama queen. I held the picture to my chest, and let a few tears trickle down my cheeks. It's amazing how, at certain times in your life, you think that everything will remain perfect, forever. How wrong we all are. I think I would give anything, to be five years old again, and the most horrible thing that happened to me was falling down on the playground, and skinning my knee. At that point in my life, I had parents to kiss it better. Who could kiss my skinned knees now?

There were too many times to count, when I wanted to rip this damn picture up, and burn it until it was nothing but ashes. Too many times have I looked at it, and wondered why my life was the one that had to get screwed up. But I couldn't destroy it, and I never would. It's the last picture I have of Charlie, and my happy family. I like to tell myself, that one day my children will wonder what their grandfather looks like, and I could pull out the picture and show them. However, to be completely honest with myself, I like to know that the events I dream about aren't some delusional fantasies, but actual things that I've experienced.

I laid it back in the box, and tucked it under one of my journals. I'll have to remember to put it up before Jasper comes home and helps me unpack. He thought I had gotten rid of it along time ago, and I know he would be upset if he knew I still had it. Everything from that time in our life that belonged to him was in a landfill somewhere.

Looking around the unpacked room, I cursed to myself. The furniture, including my new bed, wouldn't be delivered for another three weeks. I didn't think we would have the apartment until then, so I thought I was ahead of the game when I scheduled it. It didn't go unnoticed that Jasper's room was already unpacked, and his bed set up. Deciding that he and Alice hadn't had enough time to defame it yet, I would just sleep there for now. I made a mental not that I would change the sheets just in case.

I glanced up at the clock. It was only 5:00. Not feeling like figuring out which box held my books, I laid my head against the wall, trying to figure out something to do with my time.

---------------

I pulled up to the two story house, and parked my truck on the street. Everyone must have ridden with Jasper, because the driveway was still filled with all their cars. Gazing around at the modest neighborhood, I wished that my job at the local bookstore paid more. I would love to live somewhere like this, quiet and secluded. More importantly, I wanted a backyard like Alice had. The garden was beautiful, with every type of exotic plant known to mankind. Lucky Alice had her pout that could get her away with murder. When Dr. Cullen and his wife were looking for a place for their kids, they fell upon this house. Emmett and Edward could care less about some garden, as long as they had a game room. Fortunately for them, it had four bedrooms. So, there was one to spare.

I walked up the steps, and knocked on the door. I don't even know why I am here. I mean I didn't have anything else to do, and Alice had said he was getting sick. I rolled my eyes to myself. Ok, so maybe I wanted to see him. Just a little.

What the hell is taking him so long to answer the damn door? I peaked over at the driveway, and saw his silver Volvo sitting there. Obviously he's home. I moved the Tupperware container to my other hand, and rang the door bell this time. The soup was a bad idea. It was still hot, and now burning my other hand. I mean if he was sick, soup would make him feel better.

The door swung open, and Edward stood there looking annoyed. His left hand held up the green towel that was slung around his hips; his other hand was gripping the door knob.

I gulped down the knot that just formed in my throat, and let my eyes trail over his body. The muscles in his arms and chest were more defined than my imagination could have ever come up with. His hair was damp, and there were a few drops that threatened to fall into his green eyes. Why had I ever decided that I hated this man?

"What?" Edward snapped. Oh yeah, that's why. _Rude prick._

"Well hello to you too. Aren't you going to invite a girl in?" I tried to keep the conversation light. I didn't want to say what I really thought about him, and his obnoxious ways.

"You know Alice and Emmett are on that cruise, right?"

"Obviously, my brother went too." He just looked at me like I was stupid. I'm not the stupid one. He's the one who didn't even realize that if his sister went, then of course Jasper was going to.

We stood there staring at each other. I was tempted to just throw the container holding the soup, soup that I made out of the goodness of my heart damn it, and hoping it would hit him smack dab in the middle of his chest. Maybe it would still be hot enough to leave a scar. I smirked to myself.

He just threw the door open further, and stalked into the house up the stairs. Such a gentleman. I walked off towards the back of the house, heading to the kitchen, and plopped my self onto the barstool by the counter.

After another ten minutes, I was about to leave the soup sitting there with a note telling him he better return my Tupperware, when he came into the kitchen. He was wearing dark grey sweat pants, that were just as low as the towel had been, and a white tank top. It wouldn't kill me to stay for a little longer.

"So what are you doing here?" he asked me furrowing his eyebrows.

"Alice said you were sick, and she wanted me to come over." I told him. "You know, just to make sure you weren't dying or anything." I quickly added. I pushed the container towards him with the soup in it.

He quirked one eyebrow before going over to a drawer and retrieving a spoon. Hopping up on the counter, he greedily began eating it. "We don't cook much around here" he tossed as a reason for his eating habits. I just nodded my head.

"So…uh, how's work?" _How's work?_ Good one Bella. Smooth, very smooth. He just looked up and laughed before going back to eating. Damn it, I was just trying to fill the silence. He didn't have to laugh. I guess the expression on my face gave me away because he lifted his head to answer.

"Actually, not bad. They're finally letting me fucking produce an album. It's one of the newer artists, but it should help put my work into the light"

"Impressive." Which it really was. Alice had told me about his aspirations to own his own record company one day. She didn't think the people he worked for appreciated his work. I had scolded her, and told her that he was only twenty-two and just starting out in the business. He had to work his way to the top. Not everyone was going to hand him what ever he wanted, even if his parents did. We ended up arguing after that, because as she pointed out, his parents were hers too, and by insulting him, I was insulting her. I apologized, but still felt that they were given quite a lot. Unlike Alice though, Edward didn't even seem to appreciate it.

"Yeah, I guess so." He said abruptly. Ok, guess he doesn't feel like talking. Like he ever does. I was seriously getting fed up with him, and how rude he always was. Emmett and him got along ok, but only ever spent time together in that damn game room. Alice on the other hand, hardly ever spent anytime with him. He was always short with everyone, but she still took up for him. I never knew why she did, it wasn't like they were actually related, and he never put any effort into making a relationship. I guess that's not fair. Even if Jasper and I were only adopted siblings, I would still defend him.

"Good soup. Thanks," Edward interrupted my thoughts, and tossed me the empty bowl. "I'll make sure to let Campbell's know." I laughed at my own joke. He just looked at me and hopped off the counter, and walked towards the living room. I heard him turn the T.V. on, and flip it to a music channel. Sliding off my stool, I walked towards the room too. You know what? I am going to give him a piece of my mind, and let him know he shouldn't leave guests sitting by themselves.

I didn't get a chance to. He told me I could stay and watch T.V. with him, if I wanted to. Well, I really don't have anything else to do. So, I sat on the couch opposite of him, and turned towards the plasma hanging on the wall. I couldn't help myself from stealing glances in his direction every once in awhile. Stretched out on the couch, he looked like a very comfortable body pillow, and I had to force myself to stay put on my side of the room. I decided right then, that's why I hated him. Even though he was rude and obnoxious, he was utterly gorgeous, and made me feel like a damn groupie, along with all the rest of the tramps, and that made me a tramp just like them. Damn it Cullen.

When the moon started to rise, I figured I ought to leave. I grabbed my Tupperware of the coffee table, and started walking towards the door.

"See ya," he said lazily. I just gave a quick nod, and walked down the hall. I debated with myself all the way until I grabbed the doorknob. Did I want to see him again? Of course I did. Maybe I could even suggest that he be a little more polite, and he would gladly consider it. I snorted to myself. Sure he would. But I still turned back around towards the living room. He just looked up at me when I reentered the room, and smirked to himself. He probably knew exactly the effect he had on women, and I was just boosting his damn ego.

"Forget something?

"No, uh, actually, well, uh, if you want, I could bring you some more soup tomorrow. You know, so Alice would know I was fulfilling the whole best friend duty." I sputtered. What's wrong with you Bella? Talk like the damn educated woman you are, idiot.

"Sure, whatever" he responded, and even though it made me more annoyed with him, I turned around and fucking cheesed all the way to my truck. The soup was a great idea.

Review and let me know what you guys think!


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks to my beta reader seventeenforeverr! Also I would like to thank my two reviewers! Read and let me know what you think about it. Reviews are appreciated!**

My cell phone vibrated from its position on the passenger seat. I grabbed the steering wheel with my left hand, and picked up the phone.

"Hello?" I said into the phone. Alice's high voice rang through the ear piece. I could hear people speaking in the background, and Emmett's loud laugh erupting through it. It was good to hear everyone having a good time. When she asked me what I was doing for the day, I didn't exactly know what to tell her. Obviously, I was just going to come out with the truth, but I didn't fell like listening to her over dramatic excitement.

"Well Alice, I'm actually headed to your house right now." I blurted out. I waited for her reaction. "My house? Why? Is Ed-Ahh, Edward." I could hear the smile in her voice; I think she's been secretly dying for me and him to start dating from the beginning. I stopped whatever thought process she was in.

"It's not like that Alice. We've just been hanging out. That's all. Completely casual."

"Please Bella. Edward just doesn't _hang out_ with anybody."

"Edward does too hang out with people. He's hanging out with me." Now, I felt like I was the one defending him, instead of it always being her. He really hasn't been that bad, as long as there was some food involved; that's a typical guy for you. So for the past two and half weeks, I've been bringing lunch and myself of course. It was good for both of us I guess since it kept me occupied and him fed. I actually started to enjoy his company. Which was absolutely ridiculous for me to say, but it was the truth. Sure, he didn't have the greatest manners in the world, but he did seem to be working on them.

"Whatever you say," Alice laughed in the phone. I didn't want to argue with her, so I just ignored her last comment, and let her tell me all about her vacation. I pulled in front of Edward's house, and put the car in park. Sighing, I just listened to Alice go on about the incredible shops they had on the ship, and how she already had a suitcase full of souvenirs for me.

I groaned. "Come on, you know I hate when you buy stuff for me. Just take it back." I sighed and could just picture her pout as she told me it was nonrefundable, and I was hurting her feelings by not excepting. "Fine. I'll take them." I said through gritted teeth. After another ten minutes, she told me Jasper was waiting for her, and she'd call me later if she got a chance.

I slipped my phone in my pocket, locking my door, even though I knew know one would want to steal it, and walked onto the porch. Instead of knocking, I rang the doorbell. I found this was a much more effective way to get him to the door quicker. I heard a muffled 'it's open', so I pushed the door open and made my way inside. Hearing the T.V. playing in the living room, I smiled and headed towards it. I rounded the corner and saw him sitting in his usual spot.

He looked up and asked, "No lunch?". He was wearing dark blue jeans and a dark blue t-shirt today. I could feel my face heat up. I _really_ like that color blue on him. His hair was in its usual all over the place style. I had to fight the urge everyday I came over here, to not run my hands through it. He had what I liked to call "sex hair". My cheeks flushed again just thinking about it. If his hair looked like that when he hadn't just screwed somebody, could you imagine what it _would_ look like if he did? Damn.

"No. I didn't have time to go to the store. I figured I could just make something here, if that's cool?" He just nodded his head, and I turned to walk towards the kitchen. I wasn't expecting him to turn the volume down, and follow me. I threw my keys on the counter, and went to the refrigerator. They didn't have much either. It seemed that since Alice wasn't home, there was no one to get the groceries. I opened a couple cabinets, and scrounged through them.

"You are in serious need of restocking" I noted out loud, and looked up to find him staring at me as he leaned against the counter. I could feel the blood rush to my face, and I bit down on my lip as I quickly looked away. God, I was acting like a twelve year old. I mentally scolded myself, and went back to searching through the kitchen. I decided on grilled cheese sandwiches, since that's all that was available.

I could still feel him staring as I pulled out the ingredients I needed and began to butter the bread. Really I should be used to this by now. Edward stared at me a lot. Although that made me giddy, I knew I was being ridiculous. He wasn't exactly a normal guy with manners so I chalked it up as being one of his obnoxious traits, and I got over it. No matter how much it made me blush.

"Can you get me a frying pan?" I asked as I began to slice tomatoes for mine. He nodded, went over to the cabinet, and handed me one.

"Do you want tomatoes on yours too?" Maybe I could spin this out and get to know more about him. He just nodded, and continued to stare. I guess not.

I quickly went back to making the sandwiches and when I was finished I set a plate in front of him, and slid it across the counter. Grabbing mine, I went to sit next to him on the barstool adjacent to his. We ate in silence, like we normally did. However, there was something different this time. There was this humming electric surge radiating between us. Instinctively, I slid my stool away from his. I peaked at him from the corner of my eye. I wonder if he felt it too? If he did, he made no distinction that he did. Had it always been there? I racked my brain, trying to think over the past two weeks. I could remember anything that felt like this. Then again, this was the closet I had been to him in…forever.

I finished eating before he did, and just sat there with my eyes closed. Come on Bella. You are really starting to lose it, electric surge? I leaned closer just to see if it was still there. Yep, it definitely was. I inhaled deeply, and exhaled. Wow. I never noticed how good he smelled. Smell? Electric surges? I really must have left my sanity somewhere. God, but his smell… it was an odd mixture of something musky and soapy. Oh my God. I was really losing it. I leaned further away, and felt like banging my head on the counter. What was wrong with me?

Grabbing my plate, and stacking it on top of his, Edward took them to the dishwasher. "Good sandwich."

"Thanks" I sighed and laughed to myself. It was always 'Good sandwich' or 'Good chicken'. There was nothing more and nothing less. I guess I couldn't complain, they were compliments, in an Edward kind of way. He walked into the living room, and turned off the T.V. Confused, I followed him.

"I'm tired of that damn thing." He muttered laying his head back against the couch. I just leaned against the arm of the other couch. What did he want me to do about it? I sighed out loud, and just looked at the black screen. If we weren't going to watch it, then what were we going to do? That's all that we had done on my visits over here.

"Do you want to play Playsation or something?" I asked him. His eyebrows shot up, and he just looked at me. "Well, I do have a brother. I probably could even beat you." I bragged letting a smug smile play on my lips. He looked surprised, and then eager.

"Ok Swan. You think you could beat me? Let's see what you got" We headed upstairs, and went to the room directly to the left. The game room was one of the bigger bedrooms, but still had only one couch. I sat at the far side of it, and Edward just plopped onto the center cushion, making me jump a bit from the closeness. This was definitely too close for me to concentrate, and definitely close enough to feel the odd humming sensation.

He plugged in the game and turned to smirk to me. I felt the heat rise to my face again. God Swan, pull it together. I tried to win. Really I did, but between his confident and sometimes cocky smirks and that damn zapping that happened every time he bumped shoulders with me, I lost. Edward was laughing, and I couldn't help but laugh with him.

"I knew you couldn't beat me" he said smugly, brushing off his shoulders.

I scoffed at his victory dance. "I let you win" I responded. He just laughed again, and I picked up a pillow and hit him with it. It didn't take him long to find one, and hit me across the top of the head with it. I let out a gasp. "You hit a girl?"

He just smirked and raised an eyebrow, then smacked me with the pillow again. I'm not flirting…I am not flirting. I had to keep repeating it to myself. I am finally just having fun with him. It's nice to see his grumpy exterior loosen up a bit.

The sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted my thoughts. There was a woman standing there. She was probably four inches taller than me, and unlike me she had thick strawberry blonde hair. Her cleavage was hanging out of her sweater, and I couldn't help but glance down at my own attire.

"I know I'm a little early Eddie, but I figured you wouldn't mind." She said, not looking at him, but rather directly at me.

"Tanya, I told you about just walking in my house" he growled. She didn't say anything and first but responded, "Rosalie told me to make myself at home last time, I just assumed…" She shrugged at his harsh tone.

"Well look, I don't just like people coming in and out of my house like they fucking own it. Got it?" Not even looking taken aback, she just nodded her head and said sorry. I looked away from her face to Edward's. He didn't look pissed or anything, but his tone sure sounded like he was.

I could still feel her staring at me, and I was starting to feel a little uncomfortable. As if sensing the unease and casually trying to take advantage of it, she stepped forward.

"I'm Tanya." She said curtly. Edward just sighed, and ignored her. He turned to look at me. "We were headed out, I kind of forgot."

"Oh, yeah. Sure. I was, uh, just about to leave anyways." I rose from the couch, and started to walk towards the door. "If you want," Edward said, "you could still come by tomorrow." I shrugged and told him I had to work; then quickly exited the room. I heard him say something and Tanya giggle as I walked down the stairs. I just had to get out of there.

------------

Why was I so upset about this? Of course Edward had women he dated. I had heard about most of them through Alice. He was Washington's most wanted man for Christ's sake. I've known this forever. So why in the hell was it bothering me so much now?

Because I knew I wanted to be the on he asked out, even though he got on my nerves at times. This was fucking ludicrous. I haven't been jealous over a guy since…well I don't know since when. I wasn't the particular jealous type. So, it bothered me that I was now feeling this idiotic emotion. Since when did I let this bother me so much? I've watched him date since I moved to Forks, and now all of sudden after spending two weeks with him, I suddenly was upset about it.

Personally, I don't think it has anything to do with me. It has to do with Edward and that ridiculous electricity he was emitting all day. It was making me do crazy things. First, with me trying to flirt with him in the game room, and then with the whole jealousy thing. Now, it wouldn't let me stop thinking about him.

I pulled my pajama top on, and threw myself onto the bed. Covering my head with my pillow, I screamed into it. I truly was losing my mind, because now as I lay in the bed, I was wondering what he would be like in bed. Probably fucking fantastic. I snorted to myself. Why I am I torturing myself by thinking about this? Probably because I was extremely horny, and hadn't had sex for three months. I growled in frustration, and just pulled the sheets over my head.

---------------

_We laid in his backyard. The garden was surrounding my nostrils with the most wonderful fragrance, but the best was coming from him. I lifted from my chest and stared into his eyes._

_"What?" I asked him. I just looked at me, and kissed the tip of my nose. "I asked you what your earliest memory was." I kissed the tip of his nose back, and laid my head back down. His arm was wrapped around my waist, and he traced patterns with his fingertips along my skin. He was making it hard to concentrate. _

_I rolled over on my stomach and place my hands under my chin, and looked up at him. I could see my reflection in his eyes, and I didn't recognize the saddened girl there._

_"Well, I think I was three or four" I started slowly. "It was Christmas, and my par-Charlie and Renee, were taking us to see Santa." I turned my head, and laid my cheek flat against his stomach. I could feel him rubbing my back, encouraging me to continue. _

_"I don't remember if I was excited or not to be honest. But I do remember, sitting on Santa's lap, and telling him I wanted a pony for Christmas." I giggled softly, and he chuckled along with me. _

_"I said, 'Hello sir. My name is Isabella Marie Swan, and I want a pony' I didn't get an actually pony of course, but I did get a small stuffed one. It was perfect though." I finished._

_It was quiet for a moment, before he spoke again. "Why does that make you sad?" he asked quietly. I could feel the tears falling onto his dark blue shirt, but I couldn't wipe them away. _

_"Because I remember the last time I went and saw Santa." I didn't want to say anymore about it, but I knew he wouldn't understand what I was talking about. I sighed and turned my face back toward him. "The last time I saw Santa…I sat there and cried and said 'Hello sir. I don't know if you remember me but I'm Isabella Marie Swan, and for Christmas, I want my daddy back'" _

I woke up angry and frustrated. I didn't want to talk to him about that. He didn't have to know about that part of my life. He was just so easy to talk to. I rolled over on my side, and sighed. That was the first night Edward was in my dreams.


End file.
